Intentional Today

Last week I looked at submission in marriage, specifically what it’s not. Incase you missed the post, please read it here.

Submission in marriage is a popular topic across the pulpits of church (and life).

But the mandate of the husband is not always spelled out as often, or as loudly.

Sometimes, the question that circles many a woman’s mind whenever submission is mentioned is “Will somebody also teach my husband to lead?”

One Without the Other

The thing about love and submission as written in Ephesians is that it’s hard to give one without the other.

Around five years ago, a guest stood up at a wedding to share words of wisdom and present some gifts to the newlyweds.

A few minutes into his speech, the bride appeared to take a step forward.

“Where are you going?” my husband asked with a smile.

“To receive the gifts” I answered mid-stride.

“Lets wait.” He  tagged gently on my hand. “He has has not called us forward yet”

The guests did not see the twitch on my face. Or the heart dropping to my chest. But my husband may have noticed the flick of chin and the stiffened back.

(My husband wrote this post 3 years ago (yes he had a blog!). It’s a a great piece, you’ll be blessed)

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This past week my wife and I have had one of those “differences in opinion”.

We went into that parallel universe in married life that is filled with logic and emotion, skewed to justify ourselves and protect our vulnerabilities, effectively barring us out of the each other’s heart.

Now, it is important that I mention that it was my actions that caused the shift into this “twilight zone”.

A few years ago, I heard Joyce Meyer say that sometimes in marriage the more grounded spouse would need to put in extra effort to keep a marriage growing.

She was speaking from personal experience where for many years, her husband Dave, who was the more grounded of the two, carried the weight of their marriage.

Caring more

In marriage, we don’t always care about the same thing with the same amount of passion.

For example the wife who wants more conversation will find herself initiating conversation more often…at least as a start or for a season.