I’ve always had a love for books and as a teenager growing up in rural Kenya without electricity, I dreamed up a genius idea to extend my reading hours past the official “lights out” time.
The “lights” were a kerosene lamp and my parents expected it to go out shortly after bedtime.
Being the genius girl, I would slip into bed, position the burning lamp next to the pillow and pull the blankets over the lantern and my head.
I could read like that for for hours without my parents knowing the lamp was still on.
But the problem with my genius plan was that I’d fall asleep. With a book on my face and a burning-kerosene-filled-distaster-in-waiting next to my head.
I remember waking up one morning and the lamp had tipped over.
Terrified, my first thought was “I hope my mum didn’t see the light!”
The miracle of being alive was not immediately obvious.
How many of us wake up with a burning lamp next to our heads?
Come through hard times and circumstances, at some point realize and marvel at God’s mercy and goodness. But then sort of forget about it and do the same dumb thing all over again?
That’s what I did. Felt the terror of escaping the wrath of my parents – and escaping a fire. But do it again a few nights later.
What’s in your bed today?
Sometimes as young wives, we can waddle along in our ways, oblivious to the dangers of some ‘genius’ habits and plans.
He doesn’t like me talking to him that way? Oh he’ll just have to get used to it. We are all grown ups around here, aren’t we. (of course you don’t say that aloud)
Career/business/school eating into your marriage margin? Oh the marriage will just have to work around that.
And then there’s other “smaller” things
Things that add up to little piles of disasters-in-waiting.
Getting a lamp out of my bed
Lately I’ve been trying to get this one particular lamp out of my bed.
I am a bit competitive and competitive people have a bad habit of unhealthy comparison.
I’ve been feeling frustrated about my snails-pace growth in ministry and business. I’ve encountered some disappointments with our dream.
And lately (man if only I could get this lesson once and for all!) God’s been reminding me that the reason I am fighting fires is because I am trying to run another person’s race.
He’s been reminding me that when I take my eyes off Him, disasters will always rush in.
And my marriage will get hit ( a frustrated, disappointed, manic wife won’t pleasant company make )
Psalms 18: 32 – 34 has been both a comfort and challenge.
“It is God who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect. He makes my feet like the feet of deer, and sets me on my high places, he teaches my hands to make war, so that my arms can bend a bow of bronze”
It’s still a huge revelation to me, how God is not only the source of my dreams, He’s also the source of my strength to accomplish those dreams. (Tweet please)
How about you, any burning lamps you need to kick out of your bed today?
Can you hear the voice of our Father asking you to “put out that light”? Do you understand that whatever He requires of you is for your own good?
I pray that you do.
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