When I was in primary school (elementary school) I threw a broken ruler at a boy in my class.
Being the class prefect and charged with keeping order and silence in our classroom, I grew increasingly frustrated when my classmate wouldn’t stop talking and goofing around.
photo credit: thebarrowboy (creative commons)
The wooden ruler, broken on one end, landed on his head with the jagged edge sticking out of his skull.
It was not the first time- or the last – that my emotions would get a little out of control. I was generally a good kid but I had a tipping point. I didn’t know what to do with how I felt.
I am responsible
As a young adult, my outer environment continued to dictate my inner environment. I struggled with mood-swings, thought-swings and dream-swings.
I craved inner balance. But quickly discovered that the balance I craved came with discipline and self-control.
Many people have similar struggles. They desire answers to challenges but are shocked by the kind of work they have to put in to get the answers they want.
Most of us want an easier road, a magic pill.
Personally, I wanted God to change me miraculously. I wanted Him to line up my life in such a way that I didn’t have to deal with emotional triggers anymore.
I am still learning. But I have come to see that while God may provide miraculous answers to some of our problems, more often than not, He chooses to lead us down a healing path. It’s more of a journey, not an an event.
Joyce Meyer says
“Emotions won’t go away, but you can learn to manage them.”
My friend Dan Black says something similar.
“It’s not a question of if you will have emotions; it’s about reacting correctly when you do feel emotion”
Thoughts on finding emotional balance.
While searching for emotional balance, I have found these thoughts helpful.
1. We all have emotions.
Emotions are good. I call them the spice of life. Imagine a world without emotions. A marriage without emotions. Purpose without emotions. Not a pretty world!
Emotions help us stay in touch with ourselves. We make decisions based on emotions. We build boundaries based on emotions. Emotions help us know our needs.
Emotions are great..but we need to own them, not allow them to control us.
2. Emotional balance begins in our mind.
Our thoughts, premeditated or not, affect how we feel. Usually, how we feel is a result of what we’ve allowed into our minds. So to change the way we feel, we need to change the way we think.
3. It’s important to take personal responsibility
Changing the way we think means taking personal responsibility for our thoughts and actions.
This is the part I disliked. I did not want to accept that I was responsible for my lashing out/withdrawal/brooding. I felt others were responsible for how I felt.
I have since discovered that no matter what happens to me, I have the responsibility, the power to choose my response to it. It’s easier said that done of course..but the truth is that to find the emotional balance we crave, we must take back control.
4. We must align ourselves with God’s truth
As Christians, we need to be in agreement with God.
For example, if we are fearful, we must remember that God has not given us a spirit of fear but of power, love and sound mind.
Look at your situation through God’s eyes, accept his thoughts about your situation instead of assessing your situations with your own limited perspective.
As your thoughts begin to change, your feelings with begin to change too.
Questions – Have you ever struggled with emotional imbalance? How else can we find/maintain emotional balance? Please share your thoughts in Comments