I am excited to have my husband guest posting today! Here’s Tommy;
My wife loves to talk…and talk…and talk. It’s not rare for us to talk about a talk that we’ve recently had.
In contrast, I’ve always felt a certain disadvantage when it comes to communication. In the early days of marriage, I had serious challenges communicating when my wife and I had disagreements, which was rather often.
My M.O. in times of trouble consisted of avoiding “the talk,” and if all else failed, shutting down. Now, this would surprise even me because, being in sales, I talk for a living.
I really did not know how to communicate when things were rough.
I would feel a paralysis that I could not explain. So I would become defensive and hide my heart and feelings, and often go through “the talk” while strategically protecting myself.
As the years have gone by, I have gotten somewhat better at this communication thing. I have learned these 3 things from my wife, who happens to be an expert.
1. Communication in marriage is a heart thing.
In good times and in rough times, through the exciting stuff and the mundane, my wife wants to share her heart.
She wants to know my heart, and she loves it when I show that I want to know hers. (Note to self: It is not enough to want to know her heart; I have to show it. But why…? Just do it.)
Marriage requires marriage-level communication, and M-Level communication needs an engaged heart.
My wife will always be more emotionally intelligent, and that means that what comes easily to her may be a jigsaw puzzle for me.
I have to figure out what I’m feeling, then find the words, then be brave enough to share it. I’m so glad she has come to understand this.
Join me at Fulfilling Your Vows where I share the rest of the tips.