You Know you are a Kenyan in America when…

/ February 6, 2013 / Life, Personal Development, Success / Permalink

But before we take on the topic of the day…

The other day I realized that when it comes to adjusting to American life/culture, I often take the “kicking and screaming” lane – ungracious, overly critical, super sensitive, remarkably adolescent in thought, attitude and action.

kenyan in americaphoto credit crdotx (creative commons)

(if you are wondering about the Kenya/America link, you may want read our story here)

Anyway, the more I thought about my unpleasant attitudes, the more I realized that some of us tend do life/pursue dreams the same way.

We start out on a great adventure filled with ideas, plans and misconceptions.

A few steps into the journey, we begin to encounter the pain of  dreaming.

Some of us immediately engage fight mode – we fight the process, dwell on the pains and angst of it, point fingers and stick out tongues  – we become everything but gracious, grown-up, focused, learning.

At least for a season.

We struggle to accept that the main part of “success” is what we become in the journey, not what we achieve in the end.

I know that in the throes of change and culture shock, it often feels easier to compare, criticize, day dream.

All of us have a Jonah inside of us – brooding, unrelenting, furious that our “dreams” didn’t pan out the way we wanted.

Again, I know that not everyone struggles with change as much as I do.

But we all struggle with some aspect of it.

Do YOU struggle with change?

Back to the main story..

You know you are a Kenyan in Maryland when..

1. You expect the store (supermarket) attendant to walk the entire floor, looking for a product you couldn’t  find.

2. You race across pedestrian crossings.

3. Everyone seems to talk into your face (most Americans love eye contact)

4. You expect the two guys loudly airing their views to settle the argument with fists

5. You think you can jump red lights because the roads are empty (who waits at red lights in the middle of the night!?)

6. You are shell-shocked when a perfect stranger shares the story of their life within two minutes of meeting each other.

7. Neat lawns make you think about business opportunities – weddings, functions e.t.c

8. You walk into Home Depo looking for bugler proof doors and windows

9. You keep breaking down the cost of life and items to Kenya shillings.

10. You go to the barbers and expect a shampoo, hair and beard work, massage, tea/coffee e.t.c – for a single (and cheap) price.

11. You avoid the “police car” even when you’ve done nothing wrong.

12. You want to offer a “helping hand” to the parents of that child having a meltdown at the toys section.

13. Statements like “Do you know Albert? He’s from Africa too” no longer aggravate you.

14. You like guessing which part of Kenya an African-America “hails” from.

Question – Have you ever lived in a different culture/state/city/continent other than your own? What was your experience?

  • http://taunetnelel.blogspot.com/ JepB

    “You race across pedestrian crossings.” Do all Kenyans run Ngina?

    This list made my day. Change, yes I struggle, but I am growing with every change. I appreciate it all. I am hoping to travel across continents one day :) I will definitely be racing across the pedestrian crossings hahaha!

    • http://intentionaltoday.com/ Ngina Otiende

      :) You know how we literally run across roads/streets in Kenya? (cos of the unwritten code that “drivers have right of way”..lol) even on zebra crossings. Totally the opposite here. Pedestrians have right of way. No need to compete with oncoming traffic. Lotsa rules to observe too tho.

      Amen to traveling continents! you’ll love it!

      • http://taunetnelel.blogspot.com/ JepB

        We usually talk about that with my mum. How we have to constantly look over our shoulders even on a pedestrian crossing. We’ll get there one day, where the pedestrian rules :)

        Amen :)

  • http://www.encourageyourspouse.com/ Lori Ferguson

    Too funny. I’m from Ontario, Canada – and have people saying all the time – oh, I know so-and-so from Alberta – do you know him? (they are 1500 miles between the two provinces and 35,000,000 people in the country)

    I think this question is universal – we’re all trying to make connections and find common ground. I actually take this as a compliment…

    • http://intentionaltoday.com/ Ngina Otiende

      That’s hilarious Lori. It’s so true what you’ve said – people just want to find common grounds, make connection for the most part. That’s a great way to see things. Thanks so much for coming by and sharing

  • http://danblackonleadership.com/ Dan Black

    Great post. I have never been to a different country but want to at some point. I’m sure I’ll have many stories to tell after.

    • http://intentionaltoday.com/ Ngina Otiende

      Dan, I believe Leadership speaking will take you around pretty soon! You’ll soon have a lot stories to tell. :)

  • http://twitter.com/SarahMureithi Sarah Mureithi

    This is a great post! I relate to all of them very well!…I am always bargaining with no.”5. You think you can jump red lights because the roads are empty (who waits at red lights in the middle of the night!?)” Lol…

    • http://intentionaltoday.com/ Ngina Otiende

      Glad you relate Sarah!

  • Dave Arnold

    Very funny and thought-provoking. I have been in many different countries, and as much as I try, it’s hard to not stick out. Great post!

    • http://intentionaltoday.com/ Ngina Otiende

      “Hard not to stick out”. You’ve nailed it Dave :)

  • http://josephiregbu.com/ Joseph Iregbu

    I laughed in vernacular reading this. Kenyans, I hail y’all :-)

    • http://intentionaltoday.com/ Ngina Otiende

      Laughing in vernacular..that’s so funny Joseph!

    • http://taunetnelel.blogspot.com/ JepB

      Laughing in vernacular, that’s really funny!

  • http://tcavey.blogspot.com/ TCAvey

    I couldn’t imagine living in another country. I’ve gone to Jamaica a few times…while there was much there to enjoy, there were some harsh realities as well. My spouse and I thought about moving there but chickened out.

    I’m not good with change. It’s an area God has been working on in me for a while.

    • http://intentionaltoday.com/ Ngina Otiende

      I can only imagine TC. I’ve traveled in the past, but never outside my continent (and never for extended stay!) Change is not easy. Am always amazed at how God calls us to do the things we are least good at :)

      • http://tcavey.blogspot.com/ TCAvey

        LOL..

  • http://sparkvoice.wordpress.com/ DS

    As a parent of a child from Ethiopia – #13 and #14 are entertaining. We’ve had many discussions (every where) on similar topics.

    • http://intentionaltoday.com/ Ngina Otiende

      Wow that’s so awesome to hear DS, I didn’t know you have a precious one from Ethiopia (Kenya borders Ethiopia to the North) So so awesome. Am ure you can come up with a much longer list than I did :) . .

      • http://sparkvoice.wordpress.com/ DS

        He’s definitely precious! We’ve really enjoyed getting to learn about his culture and history. We’ve had him since he was 6 months old (3.5yrs) and we were able to spend about 2 weeks in Ethiopia. We’ve shared quite a bit about it at http://adoptethiopia.blogspot.com/ and look forward to going back as we are adopting again.

        • http://intentionaltoday.com/ Ngina Otiende

          Wow, heading over to your blog! Thanks so much for sharing that.

  • http://www.lifeofasteward.com Loren Pinilis

    “Do you know Albert? He’s from Africa too.” HAHAHA! Oh man, people seriously say that? That’s pretty hilarious. I think I would get really aggravated at that.

    • http://intentionaltoday.com/ Ngina Otiende

      Loren some people believe Africa is a small ‘town’ – a place where “everyone knows everyone else”…lol. For them, the idea of “Continent with many different countries” doesn’t compute. And that’s the kindest statement i could write by the way :) Some are incredulous beyond belief!

  • http://www.beyondthesinnersprayer.wordpress.com/ Barb

    That was a funny list, Ngina. I know I’m a Montanan when I get to the airport gate for the flight back to my hometown and most of the people waiting there look just as bad as I do. I breathe a sigh of relief and think, “Ahhh, I can relax now. I’m back with my own kind – the unfashionable!”

    • http://intentionaltoday.com/ Ngina Otiende

      Lol, that’s too funny Barb! I know that comfort level! Doesn’t matter, east or west, home is best!

    • http://sparkvoice.wordpress.com/ DS

      This is great – my wife is from Wyoming!

      • http://www.beyondthesinnersprayer.wordpress.com/ Barb

        Ha – she can probably relate then. I bet the waiting rooms for Wyoming look a lot like the waiting rooms for Montana. :)

  • http://www.leadtoimpact.com/ Bernard Haynes

    I love the list. I have traveled across the US and experienced talking to people with totally different backgrounds and ways of thinking than mine. It was great to experience all the different types of people this country is made of. I also love the quote on success.

    • http://intentionaltoday.com/ Ngina Otiende

      I tend to believe that America is a melting pot of world cultures..honestly every nation seems to be represented well here :) It’s such an awesome land, blessed of God and very unique. Am glad you’ve gotten around and experienced that. Thanks so much for reading.

  • http://theregoi.com/ floyd

    I always love to get your perspective. It helps alter mine.

    ‘We struggle to accept that the main part of “success” is what we become in the journey, not what we achieve in the end.” That quote is off the hook, please tweet it and I’ll retweet it, (still learning you know.)

    The closest I’ve come to anything like your list was in Mexico. It seems the men always mistake my Italian wife for Hispanic and take it rather personally I’m afraid!

    • http://intentionaltoday.com/ Ngina Otiende

      That is so hilarious Floyd!
      Funny thing my husband is much better at differentiating ethnic backgrounds. I can’t count the number of times I’ve said ” hey, listen to those guys speaking fluent German” and he’ll say “no, they are Hispanic” :)

      I’ll definitely tweet that quote, glad it has blessed you. I think you are doing good on Twitter! Thanks so much for coming by, I appreciate you.

  • Namale

    Hehehehe…hilarious list…thanks for the comment about the journey being more rewarding than the destination…it resonates major with the project I am working on. Keep writing.

    • http://intentionaltoday.com/ Ngina Otiende

      Thanks Lance. I know you have tonnes of experience, living in (and married to!) a new culture yourself :) Glad you resonate with that thought. I think once we figure that out, the journey becomes way easier. Thanks so much for reading.

  • http://www.happywivesclub.com/ Fawn Weaver

    I’ve only lived in California. The Los Angeles to be precise. I’ve lived in different suburbs in the LA area but nonetheless, always within an hour of LA. But I love traveling and I love immersing myself in other cultures. It’s one of my favorite things in the world.

    • http://intentionaltoday.com/ Ngina Otiende

      Wow Fawn, when I grow up I want to be just like you! lol.

      I honestly thought I like discovering and immersing myself in new cultures..but turns out that was just in my head..lol.
      One of the things I struggle with is the weather in East coast – humid summers, frozen winters (Kenya has tropical weather). Oh well, atleast now i know where I need to change :) Thanks so much for reading and sharing

      • http://sparkvoice.wordpress.com/ DS

        South East Texas is fairly tropical…hot humid summers, and relatively mild (especially this year) winters.

        • http://intentionaltoday.com/ Ngina Otiende

          I should move to South East Texas!