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“Marriage is not supposed to make you happy; it’s a ministry” is a message that can lead to terrible outcomes for women. This week, a reader sent me a video clip of someone being interviewed on national TV.* In the video, she argues that marriage is not intended to make us happy because it’s a…
We know we don’t want the bad marriage stuff, but what does a good marriage actually look like? Not everyone who reads my blog is married or wants to get married. I also know many are dealing with very difficult marriage situations. Others, like myself, are fortunate to be married to kind-hearted, growth-oriented spouses and…
Meet Julie. Julie is a well-rounded person. She’s strong (in that non-assuming way) and confident. She can tune into the needs of her relationship while still being in touch with her own needs and feelings. She has a deep laugh and an easy demeanor. When her friends want to cover over, her family hosts within their…
“How is marriage?” After a few months of being married, I found this question was as common as my morning cup of tea. I now know what folks wanted to hear: that marriage is fun and exciting and that I was on the upswing every single day. Unfortunately, while marriage was sweet and exciting, it…
Is it possible to have a happy marriage..without gender-specific roles, 24/7 sacrifice, and the death of your personhood? We know that growth and fulfillment as a couple are not handed on a silver platter, but what if cultural and religious conditioning makes the intentional work of marriage significantly harder? What if you could learn how…
“Men have a soft underbelly.” His tone was low and conspiratorial. The kind that made you feel like you were learning a well-kept secret. I don’t know if the men in our congregation relished having their secrets outed out like that. But I know our pastor’s admission that men are not a solid block of…