Last week I was visiting with my friend Barb Raveling in her podcast and we were talking about my experience leaving Africa, settling down in the US and what God has been teaching me. (Click here for the interview)
I told Barb how I sometimes I struggle to help others understand God and deepen their spiritual walk.
And how, when I took that challenge to God, I felt like He said
“You can’t teach others how to be intimate with me (in the sense I thought I could). I am the only one who can teach people to be intimate with me”
It’s not that I can’t encourage, share tips & principles that point in the direction of God and stronger marriages.
I can, should and I do.
But what I can’t do, is do for people what only they can do for themselves.
Cultivate an intimate personal relationship with God.
1 Corinthians 2:9-10
“But as it is written: “Eye has not seen, nor ear heard, Nor have entered into the heart of man the things which God has prepared for those who love Him.” But God has revealed them to us through His Spirit. For the Spirit searches all things, yes, the deep things of God.”
God is personal, intimate and unique to each of us.
Only His Spirit, who knows the heart of God can reveal the deep secret things of God to you as an individual.
Someone else cannot do that on your behalf.
John 14:26
“But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all things that I said to you.”
Pursuing God for yourself and your marriage
It’s important, as you read this blog and other helpful material, to always remember God is our only hope.
That we put our hope on Him, not on principles and tips.
They are all great, tips and encouragement, and God will use them to encourage us.
But they are not a replacement for actual relationship.
We need to be digging into His Word, spending time with Him in prayer and worship.
Marriage is something God helps us to do. It’s not something we do by ourselves.
And so if we neglect our relationship with God, we’ll struggle to have that extraordinary marriage we desire.
So today I want to encourage you, that if you don’t have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, or if you have slackened and fallen away, please get back with God.
Revelations 3:20
“Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with that person, and they with me.”
If you feel like your walk with God is dry and “average”, don’t settle for that dry mediocre place.
Press in for more.
Proverbs 8: 17
“I love those who love me, and those who seek me find me.”
A few things to keep in mind as you pursue a passionate relationship with God.
1. Quantity (of time) is important, but never use it as an excuse not spend time with God every day.
Maybe you can’t spend an hour in worship and the Word, but you can curve out ten minutes.
Start somewhere.
Because if you don’t start now, you can’t grow.
2. Your time with the Lord feels “dry”
Your mind wanders, you don’t know what to say, you are burdened with many things.
Put on some worship music. Intentionally turn your heart towards God and ask Him to help you connect.
It’s interesting how we learn to ask God for everything else but the ability to connect and fellowship with Him.
John 5:14 ESV says
“And this is the confidence that we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will he hears us.”
3. Make it a discipline.
Don’t wait to feel like spending time with God to spend time with God. (Click to tweet that, Thanks).
Make it a discipline. That same discipline that gets you out of bed and finds you seated at your work desk by 8am? That.
Emotions follow intentional actions and discipline eventually yields results.
4. Cultivate passion and zeal.
In his book “When Sinners say I do” Dave Harvey asks
“What is zeal? Zeal is a desire on steroids. An average football fan sits in the stands and cheers, but a zealous one will sit shirtless in subfreezing weather with his body painted in team colors.
Zeal is people who get up a 5am on Black Friday to stand in the dark to score a bargain. Zeal is a deep desire that defines how we live and reveals what we love“
I am the dancing-shouting-clapping type of person. Not saying everybody’s got to be like that (though it’d be nice to have some company, lol!)
But allow some of that life within you to ooze out and infect your outside – your worship, your life, the way you carry yourself e.t.c
If God has been good to you, it’s okay to let it show!
5. Stay obedient
James 4:8
“Come close to God, and God will come close to you. Wash your hands, you sinners; purify your hearts, for your loyalty is divided between God and the world.”
You can’t have intimacy with God and keep all your other things.
Intimacy grows when two people agree on some things. In this case you agree with God and you cut off the sin He convicts you about.
If you need prayer, have questions, you can email me. I am not a theologian or a pastor 🙂 but we can talk and encourage one another. Use my contact form here. If you a subscriber, just reply to this email, your mail will come to me directly.
Question; How do you cultivate your relationship with God? How has that impacted your marriage? Let’s share and chat in Comments
Ps. Remember to catch up with me and Barb Raveling as we talk about moving countries and the grace of God! Click over to her website and take a listen. Click here.
You are not the only one Julie! it’s funny how distractions flood in when we start our quiet time, isn’t it. but oh yes it’s totally worth it, when we press through! i will check out the pin-party, thanks for the invite!
I tried to cultivate passion and zeal…and it darn near killed my faith, because I’m simply not wired that way.
I approach God and Christ from logic…humanity could NOT have evolved from cosmic ray mutation, for example…it would have created species-ending mutations rather than selectively “improving the breed”, hence a very strong case for a Creator. Not much toe-tapping there.
God, for me, is in the details, in the smallest ways in which we treat the people in our lives. If we can’t bend the small stuff to the jesus model, we’re not going to be successful in letting Him chart our course.
http://blessed-are-the-pure-of-heart.blogspot.com/2014/09/what-harm-in-virtual-affair.html
Andrew, I think you have found your zeal and passion in detail! 🙂
We are wired differently and some are more emotionally expressive than others. Any way you can express your joy and gladness in God is wonderful, i think!
You know I’ve been really burdened lately with the many people (women in particular) that I know who also struggle to connect with God, Ngina. Recently two of my friends said that felt guilty to admit that they don’t make time with God a priority. I told them “Don’t be guilty–be motivated to pursue Him. After all, He loves You so much more than another other human can. Who wouldn’t want to be with Someone like that?” That’s how I feel and can’t imagine going without His constant presence to guide me. Blessings to you and your growing ministry, my friend!
That is such an awesome response Beth. I feel that way too, when I don’t spend as much time as i should with God. But guilt and condemnation doesn’t get as far, does it. I love your counsel to the ladies. God doesn’t get mad and frustrated, He just desires that we try again and keep on trying! Eventually there’ll be a “click” of sorts and we won’t struggle all the time. Thanks for your thoughts, they encourage me today!
I am often amazed that as soon as I sit down to study scriptures or write about it in my journal, I suddenly remember a dozen things I had forgotten: laundry in the washer, thawing meat for tomorrow’s dinner, making sure the dog went out, etc.
Am I the only person who has to war with their own brain to make sure they get the time in?
But it’s completely worth it to power through these thoughts, out the other side to great study of spiritual things.
Thanks for your post.
I also want to invite you to my Retro-Repin Party beginning Tuesday at 8 p.m. EST. Here’s a unique party where you pick 1-2 of your cool old blog posts and share them in pin form. Come visit http://somebodysdinner.blogspot.com/2014/09/retro-re-pin-party-11.html
Excellent list. I loved it when you said, ‘Don’t wait to feel like spending time with God to spend time with God’. We have to develop this kind of discipline to get to know God intimately.
So true Bernard, it’s not always easy but it yields results. Thank you for sharing
Love your five tips for pursuing a passionate relationship with God, Ngina. Just listened to your interview again on my 13 1/2 hour drive yesterday. Loved all the wise advice you had to share!
Wow, that’s a loooong drive Barb! I hope you got there well and had a good time! It was a lot of fun doing the interview, thank you for having me!
So true, each person is responsible for his/her relationship with God. I can’t read the Bible for someone else- they must do it themselves. I can share with them, but it’s up to them to listen to God, to find a relationship with Him.
No relationship works if it’s only one sided. We can’t expect God to “give, give, give” to us and we never “give” back to Him.
My marriage flourishes because of God, because of what He teaches me about love. When I’m feeling irritated at small things my hubby does, I know it’s really a reflection of me- that I need to step away and get my heart right before God. I need to spend time with God, not complain about my something my spouse does.
Amen TC, i love what you’ve said about irritations being a reflection of us, not our spouse. It’s something God has to remind me often too. Thank you for the wisdom, it’s an encouragement to me.