Why It Doesn’t Matter How Much Pastors Say “I’m Sorry”
It doesn’t matter how much pastors “apologize” if they don’t start with the truth.
On Tuesday, Robert Morris, the senior leader of Gateway Church officially resigned.
His resignation came a few days after admitting to an “inappropriate sexual behavior with a young lady” 35 years ago.
But “young lady” she was not. “Inappropriate sexual behavior” it was not. Cindy Clemishire was 12 years old at that time. She was a child. It was rape and sexual abuse of a child.
When it all came out, and Gateway church couldn’t contain the fallout, Robert was allowed the luxury of resigning: he was not terminated.
Pastors Behaving Poorly
The week before Robert’s news broke out Dr. Tony Evans, who pastors Oak Cliff Bible Fellowship Church in Dallas, released a statement saying he committed “a sin” “years ago” and was “stepping away from pastoral duties and am submitting to a healing and restoration process established by the elders.”
He did not name the “sin” but said it was not criminal. I shared on social media why Dr. Evans should be more transparent. While many people agreed, other Christians thought he didn’t have to share more than he already had.
I think Morris’s case demonstrates why the latter approach is wrong and why we shouldn’t automatically believe a pastor’s version of events.
When people say, “Let it go,” “We don’t need to know the sin,” “It’s between him and God,” “He repented,” “He said he was sorry,” “He stepped away for a time of reflection and restoration,” “Stop judging,” etc. ..
Robert Morris shows us that burying our heads in the sand and spiritualizing things doesn’t work. We need to stop. Read More Should Pastors Confess Sins Publicly? Should We Forgive and Forget?
The guilty party is not a trustworthy source of information. At the very least, we should not believe their version of events as the whole truth.
It Doesn’t Matter how Much Pastors Apologize: Of Blind Faith
It’s unfortunate, but many Christians are taught never to question what they believe. It’s often seen as sinful to critically examine your own beliefs.
Consequently, changing one’s mind over long-held but unhealthy beliefs becomes really hard because you cannot change what you cannot interrogate.
A good portion of the evangelical fundamentalist world made up of well-meaning (and not-so-well-meaning) people believing and protecting unhealthy and harmful stuff. Read More Why Pastors Need Accountability Too
That’s why a famous person will be outed as a predator and child molester, and they’ll still say we’re praying for him, and God forgave him, and this is an attack. He’ll confess to being really good at targeting vulnerable girls (watch the video on The Wartburg Watch) and the fact that he’s confessing to being a predator is lost to many.
Christians can’t question the pastor because they can’t interrogate their faith. There’s no margin, no curiosity, no introspection, no awareness. Just regurgitation of patched up verses to justify why the pastor is being attacked, how much they love him and why he should be forgiven.
(Ps, you can love someone who commits criminal acts. They can be loved and morally bankrupt. Two things can be true at the same time. Thinking that a strong love cancels out criminal behavior is mistaken. Delusional, at best.)
Christians need to understand that we can’t engage in “healing” without first allowing the truth to pierce every dark place.
Robert Morris and Dr. Tony Evans have minimized (lied) about their actions for years. They’ve engaged in cover-ups. They’ve presented (and benefited from) an image different from who they are. And when the truth caught up with them, they still are determined to escape the full consequences of their actions.
Morris Resignation: Why It Doesn’t Matter How Much Pastors Apologize
Often, pastors don’t get away with bad behavior by themselves. They often have a host of enablers.
Abuse of power at the clergy level is often systemic. It’s not just one man at the top misusing power. It’s often about a man who is part of a system that is okay with misuse of power because that’s the system. And the enablers are not just enablers; they are also beneficiaries.
Let’s look at the board of elders at Gateway Church (Robert Morris’s church.)
In the latest statement announcing their acceptance of Robert’s resignation, the board of elders said they “did not have all the facts of the inappropriate relationship between Morris and the victim.”
Yet, in a previous statement from a few days before in which they had defended Robert, the same board said Robert went through a “two-year restoration process (that was) closely administered by the Elders at Shady Grove Church (and) professional counseling and freedom ministry counseling.”
What kind of process (church and professional) knows there’s a “young lady” involved but doesn’t bother with the bare minimum..like to ask her age? Name? Reach out for corroboration?
So here’s a board that stated, “There have been no other moral failures,” “Pastor Robert has walked in purity,” and “the matter has been properly disclosed to church leadership,” now admitting they hadn’t bothered to find out what the real issue was. They were charging full speed, two years long, with zero knowledge of what they were dealing with.
They relied on self-reporting and did not bother with due diligence, but they were quick as a bird to say their man was all right.
It doesn’t matter how much pastors apologize (say they regret what they did) if right now, they cannot tell the whole truth.
My heart aches for Cindy and all victims
In one of the interview reports, Cindy Clemishire says she has been “sharing her story privately for decades with leadership in “very large and high profile” churches and organizations, but no one took Morris out of ministry or the pulpit. Now she is coming forward publicly to encourage others who may be victims to tell their stories.” Source
Yesterday, Cindy released a statement via her lawyer saying Gateway church knew the exact nature of the crime in 2005.
Are you frustrated with bad theology being used to justify your painful experiences?
I wrote Courage: Reflection and Liberation for the Hurting Soul for women who are tired of shouldering all the relational responsibilities while their partners enjoy the benefits. You deserve better. “Ngina has captured the depth of a woman bound in abuse and manipulative interpretation of the Bible. Courage has put into words the cry and tears of bleeding souls. It will validate, embrace and set you on a path of true healing.” Reader. ORDER AMAZON I PDF
Exposure is what happens when you hide your sin or never take accountability. You might think you got away from what you did wrong, but never will. Jesus exposed those who took advantage of the people, with their do’s and don’t thinking they would get away with their wrongdoing. After all these years these preachers taught, preached without any remorse knowingly they were deceiving their congregations. This type of behavior may have been excused by their board members, while their victims went through years of pain, suffering and trauma. I don’t think once they thought how much pain they caused for if they did they would have taken responsibility. They hid their lies because nobody cared enough to do what was right, they were protected while the victims were shamed. This is never right or should never be taken lightly, many are sheep in wolves clothing destroying the very flock they preached to every Sunday. God give us men who fear God more that will stand up for those who can’t defend themselves. My heart goes out to those who were abused. God heard your cry !!
One commentator said about Robert Morris’ behavior that “he is a predator, a narcissistic manipulator”! I have listened to pastor Morris for months and loved his preaching. I will not anymore.
However, I remember a long time ago someone said the Lord can and will use anybody to get His Word out. He can even use the devil to get His word out if that is what is available at the time”. So it would seem God did use a devil to preach His Holy word for years in Robert Morris case!
I’m glad you were able to access that part of us that can wrestle with new information and make adjustments ❤️🩹
I think we use “God can use anyone” to bypass God using BASELINE honest, decent people to get the word out. There are a great many people in the world, and there’s literally no reason we have to resort to a child rapist to be the messenger. That’s just an excuse to prop up male predators in the church.
And if we consider it for even a second from the perspective of victims, we see how impossible it is to continue to have these men who have committed such acts preaching God’s Word. From the victim’s perspective, it means that the sin committed against them is not that bad. “Raping me doesn’t disqualify him from church leadership, so God must not think rape is that bad. My safety must not be that big a deal. I must not matter much. Sexually assaulting people isn’t an important sin.” We can see the results of sending this message in all the victims who learn to mistrust God, who leave churches in droves, etc. And they are *right to do so given what was done to them.
As wonderful as it is that God’s word goes out, I feel very uncomfortable with the notion that “God still used them to bring His gospel to people”. Let me tell you – I was harmed more, not less, by those who both preached the gospel and violated me and my trust. I would have been far better off if the perpetrator never pretended to be a Christian. God has had to do so much damage control in my heart. When God’s word is preached by wolves it becomes poison. I’m sure there are people out there still grateful that they were brought into the faith through a wolf in sheep’s clothing, but they continued to trust God despite the wolves, not because of them.