Hi friend!
I’m Ngina (pronounced GAY-nuh) and I am certified marriage coach, author and blogger. I love encouraging women in their relationship with God and their husbands.
On this site, I help wives navigate the early years of marriage so they can thrive. Through my books, 1:1 marriage coaching, free marriage library, and hundreds of marriage articles on this site, I help you identify and overcome marriage obstacles and develop a healthy marriage mindset.
I believe God wants you to thrive! Through daily intentionality of habit, thought and intimacy with Him, you can have the marriage of your dreams!
Unfortunately a lot of newlyweds come into marriage expecting glorious bliss without much effort.
And we are not even aware of our naive expectations until the adjustments and reality of doing life with another person rocks our honeymoon cocoon.
I’ve been there
Eleven years ago, I waddled into marriage, fresh-off Singles Highway.
I was filled with grand ideas and bucket-loads of expectations.
Chief among them? It was my husbands job to make me happy and I could reap maximum benefits with minimum investment.
Lots of heartache, tears and tantrums later, I began to get a clue: that a great marriage is indeed created, not served on a silver platter.
So on this blog I share my lessons and hope that you too will learn to be intentional in marriage.
I show you how God is on your side (because marriage is His idea, not ours) and how He helps us create a marriage that lasts a life time.
I encourage you to do your part, which involves a lot of trust in God and obedience (which involves a lot of death to “self”!)
One of my favorite quotes is by Jim Rohn; “The problem with drifting is that you cannot drift your way to the top of a mountain”
We can’t drift our way to joy, we work ourselves there.
So I will challenge you to fall in love with God, your husband and your marriage …. deeply, intentionally, everyday.
We will learn to overcome mindsets and attitudes that stop us from becoming all God created us to be.
For the older in marriage, I hope you stick around! You will find tips, insights and thoughts to refresh your marriage.
I typically share fresh insights to help your marriage 1-2 times a week so make sure to sign up for the emails and freebies!
Sign up for Marriage Coaching
Are you wrestling with feelings of overwhelm in marriage? Wanting to overcome relationship obstacles so you can enjoy marriage again? Do you want to restore the fun and romance in your marriage? I can walk with you through my one-on-one Marriage Coaching For Wives program. Click here to learn more.
Check out my books
I have written two books.
This posts includes affiliate links. See disclosure
- Blues to Bliss: Creating Your Happily Ever After In The Early Years. You don’t have to argue and stress through the early years of marriage. You (yes, you!) can change the dynamics of your marriage so you can enjoy marriage as God intended. The book is available as Paperback I Kindle I Nook I PDF I Or you can click here to go to book page.
- The Wedding Night: Embracing Sexual Intimacy as a New Bride is a no-fluff down-to-earth guide to help the newlywed wife and engaged woman become sexually confident in marriage. Buy the book Kindle I Paperback I Nook I PDF Or Click here to go to book page.
Invite me to speak
Want a speaker for your marriage/singles event? Click here to invite me to speak in your event.
You can also begin your journey by sampling a few posts under these categories
Connect with me
Questions, inquiries? Email me via Contact page
Grow your marriage daily! Connect with me on Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram and Twitter
What I believe
I believe God created marriages to thrive. For spouses to make intentional choices that align to His Word and intention, so they can thrive as He intended.
I believe in one perfect God who exists as a three-in-one Being ; God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit.
I believe the Bible is God’s perfect Word – divinely inspired, without error and unable to fail.
I believe in Jesus Christ as the eternal Son of God and Savior of man kind. He was born physically of a virgin birth and He lived a sinless life on earth.
He was crucified and died on a cross, was buried, and then rose again on the third day according to Scriptures and now lives at the right hand God as our great High Priest.
I believe God created mankind for fellowship with Him but sin, which entered the world through disobedience, separates us from enjoying this relationship.
But through Jesus Christ, all men and women now have access to the Father when they repent and believe in Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior.
I believe the Holy Spirit is a divine Person, sent to guide, indwell and empower the believer, and to convince the world of sin, of righteousness and of judgment.
Thank you for visiting!
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Disclaimer This website is designed to provide information concerning the material covered. It is given with the understanding that the author and Intentional Today are not engaged in rendering licensed advice. If such advice or other expert assistance is required, the services of a licensed professional should be sought.
I have been married for 17 years. I know that marriage is worth fighting for and that we need encouragement from others that can’t relate to our situation to some degree. I came across this website while trying to understand why my husband keeps acting the way he does. I’m not sure what the future holds for my marriage but I feel very encouraged after coming to this website.
Thank you
Oh Ray, so glad the encouragement here has been helpful. I hope you have one or two trustworthy friends or trusted counsel that you can confide in for further help
I was married before for just over 20 years and after that relationship fell apart, I secluded myself in punishment and embarrassment ready to spend the rest of my life alone in order not to be the cause or reason for another failure. My heart, body and soul could not go thru it again. I had hit bottom – 2 suicide attempts within 6 months of each other. Now almost 5 years later, with medication and therapy, I am doing much better and continue to improve each day. I have found a man who is deeply faith oriented – not that I wasn’t before, just with a person who’s beliefs did not align with mine – and after a couple of years of wearing me down, we are making plans to get married later this year. I tried everything in my power to show him that I wasn’t worth having but he convinced me otherwise, has helped me to trust in my faith and God along with showing me that what I thought and was told about myself was not true. I somehow “stumbled” onto a couple of your articles or blogs and was immediately hooked. I needed something to help guide me in my future with this man and to strengthen my faith in myself and God. I want to be able to put everything I am into my marriage without losing a part of myself which I feel that I did before. I feel that I missed important things in the past. I want him to feel cherished, wanted and needed. I want to support him in everything possible. I also want the same from him. I am happy to read your emails and articles and look forward to receiving. So….. a big thank you.
Becky
Oh Becky, I am so glad to read your story…thank you for sharing it with me. May the Lord continue to lead you and surround you with wonderful counsel. I pray you are part of a Bible believing church and a strong Christian community ; it’s one of the ways we stay whole and growing. Many blessings
Hello. I stumbled upon your posts by “accident” as the Lord would have it. I have spent the past 4 hours reading about issues devouring my marriage. I have also discovered my part in those issues, particularly with a Type A personality. I am married to an “immature, temper-tantrum throwing” man-child. I have been for 9 years. You are the first person I have come in contact with who understood and address this subject in marriage. Because of my deeply rooted protective instincts, reared up in my from a very unprotected childhood, I have struggled with letting go and letting God, when negative events have occurred. I have come to the rescue every single time for three reasons. One I did not want to see my husband suffer. Secondly, I did not want to suffer either. Third, I have run out of energy to deal with the name-calling, screaming, demeaning temper-tantrums.
This is something I have struggled with in two marriages now. This 1st lasting 9 years and now on the brink of a second marriage at 9 years I am feeling this may end as well. Why? It appears that my energy to support these “man-childs” is about 9 years and then I am exhausted taking on what should have been the Lords to handle all along.
Oddly, my children who are 16 and 20, I had no problem steering and guiding them to do right and turn from wrong. As a Christian mother I have understood that part of growing up is suffering a consequence or two along the way in order to learn and grow. WHY…have I not been able to apply this directly to my marriage? I’ve never made the connection.
Well I once was blind but now I see. Knowing our Lord Jesus Christ, I am ready to begin letting Him take control over my husband’s life and allowing him to bring about whatever it is He sees fit. I have always trusted the Lord to provide and care for me and my children and without fail He has.
God bless you for your wisdom; as it may have just saved a marriage and a family.
Hi Njina. I am glad to find this website. I was struggling helplessly to forgive my husband who confessed that he cheated on me. we are just four years in marriage. The shock and the disappointment led me to this site. I have forgiven my husband and pray that the Lord may heal my broken heart.
EMILY
Emily, I am so so sorry. I am glad you’ve taken a step to forgive your husband. You need to take another step though, one of engaging Christian counsel..please talk to your pastor or mentor and allow them to walk you and your husband to a place of restoration. Test had been broken and beyond forgiving (which is powerful) you need to heal and trust again. That’s where Christian counselling/restoration process comes in.
Hi Ngina. I bumped into your fb page. I’m so glad I did. Can’t wait to read the articles and books. I’m a 30-yr-old single lady, newly in a relationship and it’s been such a blessing the last two months. Looking forward to marriage, purposing to learn as much as I can, improve and grow.
Hi Mutanu! I am so glad the blog has been helpful! Welcome to the community and I hope the words here continue to bless your journey!
Hi Ngina. Im a missionary from the Philippines and we have a ministry also for the couple. I find your blog a blessing to our ministry. the insights and wisdom from the word of God are very helpful. Just want to ask your religious affiliation and what is your statement of faith. i’m sorry for asking this. but i just want to confirm that we are in the same faith. thank you and God bless.
Hi FS! I am so glad to hear my thoughts have been helpful in your marriage ministry. Praise God! Not sure if this will answer your question, but I am part of non-denominational church, so in that sense I don’t have a religious affiliation. I am a born-again Spirit filled believer. Thank you for bringing up the statement of faith, I have added it above. on this page. Thanks and many blessings!
Hello Ngina, i am very happy to have found your site! i was reading your teamwork in marriage artivle and it gave me very good insights. I am a mom of a 2 year old and a 2 month old, I am an architect with a fulltime job that thanks to God I can work from home and take care of my sons and house, and I am also the main source of income for our household. I am struggling with a husband who is ill ( back problems, stressed, also has a problem on one leg) and who is an entrepreneur, and is not able to fully provide for our family, he is constantly complaining about me not helping him, he wants me to help him in his business, so i can help him push the company with the goal in mind that he will eventually fully provide for our family and I won’t have the need to work. I feel so frustrated because i do a lot and don’t feel appreciated, he talks about workings as a team, and i think I am doing my part of the team work. I don’t think is fair what he wants from me, I sm not sure if I am being an enabler or if i am just not getting it, the whole thing about helping him because i think i am helping, I am doing a lot for our family.
Mel, so glad the articles have been helpful to you! It sounds like you are juggling a lot and are not feeling understood/helped by hubby. And he’s handling a lot too, physically and on the business end as he’s trying to get things going. I understand your situation on that level because my husband and I have both been entrepreneurs.. i still am. I would suggest, have you thought about talking to a close trusted friend/mentor? I know it helped us to talk to a mentor who could speak wisdom into our lives when we were so tunnel-visioned and caught up with “me” and business. Also, talk to God. And keep going to Him to sort our YOUR heart, even as you trust Him to sort out your husbands heart and help you both with communication.
As a fellow Christian and newly married, I am SO glad to have found your site. It is hard to find a writer/blogger that combines them both in an honest way. I look forward to reading your articles and exploring your site more!
Welcome to the fellowship! 🙂 And thank you for reading, I hope you find encouragement that will strengthen and encourage you and your marriage.
Thank you!
Great work, love your article, i am aslo a passionate believe that we can get the best and great a wonderful relationship with our spouses. We just have to just get ourselves totally dedicated and committed to it, with the grace of God….that is why i decided to create a group on fb i called: Sexuality in marriage:our need and concerns, your write ups are wonderful. I will be sharing them with my group members. Thanks Ngina and God bless you for your good work.
Thank you Obi! I am glad the articles resonate! I am always excited to hear from other Christians who champion Godly marriages. God bless you and your ministry. Sure, feel free to share with the group members. Thank you for coming by. God bless!
Wow,every time i read here ,i keenly listen and say less,but i must say you are like an {endless ‘echo’…..} of course comparative….
I take ‘{endless echo}’ means good things..lol. Thanks so much, glad you stop by and read
Nice to meet a Kenyan(?) Christian(?) blogger.
Could you possibly add a Like button for your posts?
So nice to meet you too Abraham! I am Kenyan and Christian 🙂
I have a Facebook ‘like’ button for posts. You’ll find it on top of the posts and the bottom (“share and enjoy” row) along with other social media buttons. Thanks for stopping by.
Loved your fiction story – creative!
I love that you show your heart in your posts. I look forward to following you. Blessings Always, Diane Roark I would be honored if you would check out my blog and follow me at: http://www.recipesforourdailybread.com