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Someone asked “how do you convince a loved one, through Scripture, that getting away from your abuser was the right thing to do?” Quick answer. You don’t. You don’t need to convince anyone. But let’s dig deeper. Someone who doesn’t see abuse or the need for safety for the victim will not be convinced by…
“How to be a good wife to a bad husband” is one of many search phrases bringing people to this website. A search phrase is what you type into your search engine’s search field to look up ideas online. Before we look at how to be the most-splendid wife to the most-unsplendid spouse, let me…
Does unclear language or presenting opposing ideas when speaking into a harmful situation keep women spinning their wheels in abuse? I believe it does. Based on some conversations I’ve had online, some people believe God can change anyone, including hardhearted harmful people. And so, to them, it’s essential to hold space for change, even as…
A few years ago, I wrote, “a great marriage is made up of two people who consistently put their vows before their feelings.” I have since changed my mind. Sometime last year, a reader asked if I still stood by the statement above. My answer: there’s a lot I wish I could unsay because I’ve…
Character issues in marriage: Many women find themselves in marriages where a spouse is deeply wounding or immature, or proud but won’t address these individual character issues. Or the spouse says they are “working on it,” but the wife never really sees the long-term fruit of that work. She wants to know what’s going on,…
Anyone else wonders what would happen if women (and men!) came to their own, pushed back against abusive theology and lived out the authentic Christ-centered gospel? I think some churches would empty out. What saddens me about spiritual manipulation, control, and awful theology is how the path to health and wholeness is labeled harmful. Those…